Writer schizophrenia
Yeah, it's really early (and I've been awake since 3:30); and yeah, I had to look up how to spell "schizophrenia." But it's important to this morning's post. I'm in that state of writing Bewitched & Betrayed that I like to call "writer schizophrenia" (saying it's different from having to actually spell it; dang, that's a funky word).
I'm on Chapter 18 of probably 25. I think I'm coming up on the section that starts the end, but I'm not sure. And it's waking me up in the middle of the night, which makes for a cranky, sleep-deprived author when the alarm goes off at 5:45. BTW -- Based on a comment from Ace to yesterday's post, I did the math (I know, that's an amazing feat for an English major) and between my day job and writing job, I put in approx. 65 hours a week, every week, all year. No wonder I'm tired all the time. ; )
To my definition, "writer schizophrenia" is that special time in the writing of a book when you go back and forth between "It's good!" to "You suck!" When I woke up at 3:30 this morning -- or I should say when the book woke me up at 3:30 in the freaking morning -- I was most definitely in the "you suck and so does your book" phase. Of course, this oh so special time in a book's development happens with every book, but since my deadline's entirely too close, my muse slaps me awake at ungodly hours to tell me how deep the doo-doo is that I'm standing in -- like I don't already know it. Whatever would my self-esteem do without my muse. ; ) But when is a deadline not looming over my head?
It'll all work out (as always), and the book will be fine. But two nights worth of writing have been lost this week due to sheer exhaustion. Last night I had to go to bed at 8:00. I'd tried to write, and an hour later, I was just staring at the screen like a zombie after only having gotten out half a page. I knew creating anything worthwhile wasn't going to happen, and I had a headache that made me want to take my head off and put it in a box.
But it's Friday (always good), and it's Friday the 13th (always a good day for me for some reason). Tonight, I will pound Chapter 16 into submission, and this weekend, I will get an amazing amount of work done.
If I say it, hopefully it shall be.
Happy Friday the 13th!
Lisa
I'm on Chapter 18 of probably 25. I think I'm coming up on the section that starts the end, but I'm not sure. And it's waking me up in the middle of the night, which makes for a cranky, sleep-deprived author when the alarm goes off at 5:45. BTW -- Based on a comment from Ace to yesterday's post, I did the math (I know, that's an amazing feat for an English major) and between my day job and writing job, I put in approx. 65 hours a week, every week, all year. No wonder I'm tired all the time. ; )
To my definition, "writer schizophrenia" is that special time in the writing of a book when you go back and forth between "It's good!" to "You suck!" When I woke up at 3:30 this morning -- or I should say when the book woke me up at 3:30 in the freaking morning -- I was most definitely in the "you suck and so does your book" phase. Of course, this oh so special time in a book's development happens with every book, but since my deadline's entirely too close, my muse slaps me awake at ungodly hours to tell me how deep the doo-doo is that I'm standing in -- like I don't already know it. Whatever would my self-esteem do without my muse. ; ) But when is a deadline not looming over my head?
It'll all work out (as always), and the book will be fine. But two nights worth of writing have been lost this week due to sheer exhaustion. Last night I had to go to bed at 8:00. I'd tried to write, and an hour later, I was just staring at the screen like a zombie after only having gotten out half a page. I knew creating anything worthwhile wasn't going to happen, and I had a headache that made me want to take my head off and put it in a box.
But it's Friday (always good), and it's Friday the 13th (always a good day for me for some reason). Tonight, I will pound Chapter 16 into submission, and this weekend, I will get an amazing amount of work done.
If I say it, hopefully it shall be.
Happy Friday the 13th!
Lisa
posted by Lisa Shearin at
6:51 AM
11 Comments:
I'm sure it will be fine! Getting close to deadlines always makes me so much more productive :)
65 hours per week.
Yep. We need to get you your own keg.
;)
Hahaha writer schizophrenia. What an apt name for it.
Thanks, H!
Ace, only if the keg is full of something caffinated.
Name your bean and I'll see if we can get a fundraiser going.
If not a keg, maybe one of those bags of coffee.
Big bag.
Size of a Buick big.
LOL!! Until a few months ago, I drank coffee, but with the diet (and an attempt at eating healthier) I've gone to green tea. Like Raine, I love green tea with jasmine -- lots of jasmine. Oh the heavenly aroma. : )
There's an Oriental market here in town I keep meaning to go to, but with my non-stop schedule, I haven't gotten around to it.
I haven't ever tried it with jasmine... I should
good luck Lisa!
While I am sure that your book does not suck, I know that it won't suck in the end. But I suppose you knew that...
try to stop by te store, and good luck with not being a zombie! (I was one for basically this entire week)
Is there any way that you can go to sleep early everyday and wake up at 3:30 feeling awake and able to write?
Good lick, Lisa!
The Trouble With Demons
April
oh gosh, that is a long time
I go through bouts of "It sucks/No, it's good" throughout the entire book. I wish I could figure what sets it off. Logically, I know it's not going to be perfect instantly. I'll have to go back make additions, deletions and revisions. But darn it, some part of me evidently expects perfection from word one. Arrrgh.
Thank you, Anonymous! Unfortunately, I'm not a morning writing person, so a 3:30 am start time wouldn't work for me.
Stacey, I do the same thing throughout the entire book too, but it gets worse for me in the last 1/3 of the book, when I'm trying to tie all those plot lines together.
{Smile}
Yet it's times like these that makes the point where the story does finally come together and Actually Work so sweet! {REALLY BIG GRIN, wink}
Anne Elizabeth Baldwin
You don't suck as a writer. I'm eagerly awaiting the next installments.
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